I Have a Conditional Discharge

If you know what I mean.


Calvin hates Jeff Gordon


Pretty good looking for a Garf


I hope you had a good Valentine’s Day

I know I did! A few lucky garf1 fans got special valentines. Pictures to follow.

For now, know this: I love you all.


I sure could go for a Nature’s Path Organic Optimum energy bar.

Too bad…oh you know. Should we believe anything is “organic?” Ever?


I could really go for a CLIF Kid Organic ZBaR Peanut Butter Bar

Too bad it turns out they’re all tainted. With salmonella. AKA shit. And were never organic. And were actually made with grade Z  bottom-of-the-barrel peanut butter. Gross.

Still…I could go for one. If I didn’t have to worry I’d die like the eight people who’ve died from tainted peanut butter. Yeah. Dang.




Fell in love with a groundhog

I fell in love with a groundhog once. She kept wanting me to call her a woodchuck. It’s funny how the little things can get so big. Isn’t it?

Six more weeks of winter. Please.

Don’t Cry Wolf

You know what I mean…